When Joy Comes Back
“I wanna be ready, When joy comes back to me.”
How’s your joy meter? I ask myself. Sometimes it’s been absolutely flat, especially during our challenging pandemic. But recently it has been ramping up, growing, and sometimes I’m darn right reaching exuberance. But when I get to that low place, I have to ask myself - “What am I listening to?”
What are you listening to? What internal voice? What monkey mind? What chatter? or what podcasts or news? and for me, especially - what music? What am I filling my life with? Because it makes a difference.
Do I need to wallow in some Blues and have a good wail? If so, go for it. It’s cathartic. Then move the energy and gradually lift the sound to something more jubilant. It’s not that complicated. But you must be mindful and deliberate about it. Sometimes we get stuck and have gone unconscious. Gather a friend if you need support. And don’t be shy in asking. We need each other. Haven’t we learned that in the past year and a half!
One of my dearest friends, Maggie, died this year. Not Covid. Cancer. We met in our Mythology Studies in New York in 2008. A Birmingham native, gifted thespian, storyteller, writer, her family civil rights history runs deep - as in the Birmingham Institute. In recent years, she had been a true champion and instrumental in supporting my work. I visited her in Birmingham in the past years, during her illness, and in our mutual thrust around current civil rights issues. We spent hours talking, reading poetry aloud to one another, doing artwork, taking walks in the woods that became shorter with her weakening state, and listening to music…namely one of her favorites - Ruthie Foster.
Ruthie’s song “When Joy Comes Back” with album of the same title, sounds so much like an old spiritual blues that I had to research it. But no, Ruthie had it written by Sean Staples. But after a rough patch in her life she was resurrecting herself and went back to her roots, and namely that gospel feel and sound she had grown up with. You feel it, you hear it. With Derek Trucks on slide guitar, it’s that sweet Southern through the soil kind of feeling you just can’t name. I know I have done some fertile digging in the soil, searching for the wellspring.
I dare say we’re all going through a little “putting ourselves back together again” time. I have written about this previously, but I still find people emerging and dealing with our brave new world in varying stages. That’s to be expected. We are all different humans with different demands and abilities. All in good time. But I ask you, as Ruthie’s first cut on the album has also taught me, “What Are You Listening To”?
In this season of All Saints, All Souls, Day of the Dead, my loved ones on the other side seem to be demanding my attention. The veil is thin. I am so grateful for all of the things they have taught me. Maggie taught me to love, create, and live fiercely and left me the music of Ruthie Foster.
Every now and then I do a little review:
“What am I listening to?”
“Are we listening?”
Like Ruthie,
“I wanna be ready, When joy comes back to me.” - Ruthie Foster